The present application relates to the technical field of finite element simulation analysis, and specifically discloses a large bearing capacity earthquake-temperature self-adaptive viscous damper and a simulation calculation method, which comprises the following steps: S1: establishing a three-dimensional solid model of a temperature deformation joint and a viscous damper with a stiffness adjusting valve; S2: obtaining a finite element model of the three-dimensional solid model; S3: obtaining a critical speed and a load working condition speed of the viscous damper, and establishing a multi-state self-adaptive stiffness adjusting model of the viscous damper based on the ratio of the load working condition speed to the critical speed; S4: obtaining a time difference value of the stiffness adjusting valve from the start of closing to the complete closing, and establishing a virtual displacement quantification model; S5: adding the multi-state self-adaptive stiffness adjusting model and the virtual displacement quantification model to the finite element model; and S6: performing mechanical simulation analysis on the finite element model. The present application can accurately simulate the complex mechanical behavior of the damper under the conditions of multi-state switching, virtual displacement effect and bidirectional earthquake reciprocating action.